You are not the only one in this exact situation. Here's what actually worked — from the stuff parents in Zionsville, Carmel, and Fishers are actually doing right now.
Okay. Deep breath.
You looked up the summer camp you want. You found the registration form. And then you saw it: Children must be fully potty trained, including bowel movements.
Your child is not. And camp registration opens in a few weeks.
If you just felt your stomach drop a little — welcome to the club that no one admits they're in but approximately half of Hamilton County is currently a member of. You are not behind. You are not failing. You are just up against a real deadline and a child who has their own timeline.
Here's everything that actually helps.
Potty training has two parts that don't always happen together: urination and bowel movements. Most kids get the first part down first — sometimes quickly. The second part is where things get complicated, where kids dig in, where the staring-at-you-in-the-corner-pooping-in-a-pull-up phase begins, and where parents start quietly researching whether this is normal.
It is normal. Stool withholding and potty refusal are among the most common toddler issues pediatricians see. Children withhold for a lot of reasons: it feels different, it feels like losing something, constipation made it hurt once and now they're scared, they want control over something in a world where they control very little. None of that means you've done anything wrong. It means you have a small human with a strong will and a nervous system that's still figuring things out.
The good news: behavioral potty refusal (not caused by a medical issue) usually does respond to consistent, low-pressure strategies over a few weeks. Six weeks, if your child is developmentally ready, is a realistic window.
This is the one most parents resist — and the one that parents consistently report was the turning point. Pull-ups during the day teach kids nothing. They feel identical to a diaper. If your child knows a pull-up is there, they'll use it.
Switching to underwear during waking hours — accepting that there will be accidents, having a plan for cleanup, keeping your reaction calm and matter-of-fact — creates the real feedback loop your child needs. Keep pull-ups for naps and nighttime only. Daytime is training time, and training requires underwear.
Do this on a Friday so you have two weekend days at home before the Monday pressure returns. Have 8–10 pairs of underwear ready. No shame, no drama, just "this is what we do now." Your calm sets the tone.
A lot of kids who resist pooping in the potty are actually struggling with the position. The standard toilet height puts kids' feet dangling in the air, which makes it mechanically harder to have a bowel movement — your body needs ground contact to bear down effectively.
A small step stool under your child's feet while they sit on the potty seat (or a child-size potty on the floor) makes a significant physical difference. Add this before assuming the problem is purely behavioral.
Also worth checking: diet. Constipation is a common underlying factor. If your child's stools are hard or infrequent, talk to your pediatrician about fiber intake or stool softeners. A child who associates pooping with pain will avoid it — and no reward system will override that.
The "sit on the potty after every meal" strategy works better than waiting for signs. After meals, the gastrocolic reflex naturally prompts bowel movement activity in most people — including kids. Sit times of 3–5 minutes after breakfast and after dinner, with no pressure to produce anything, builds the routine without the conflict.
The key: make it boring and low-stakes. No iPad, no books, no big show. Just sit, wait, try. If nothing happens, get up and move on. If something happens, celebrate calmly. You want the potty to feel like a normal part of life, not a performance with an audience.
Sticker charts work for some kids and do absolutely nothing for others. You know your child. What do they light up for?
Some kids respond to a special small toy in a jar they can see — and each successful potty use gets them closer to unlocking it. Some kids respond better to activity rewards ("every time you poop in the potty, we go to the park after dinner"). Some respond to verbal celebration more than anything physical — a massive "YES! You did it!" reaction from a parent they want to please.
One thing that tends to backfire: rewards for sitting on the potty rather than for actually going. If your child learns they get a reward just for sitting, they'll sit indefinitely and produce nothing — and you'll have a different problem.
I know it feels like information will help. "You need to be potty trained or you can't go to camp." Most kids under 4 don't have the cognitive framework to connect a future event to current behavior in a way that motivates them — and the pressure often backfires, increasing anxiety and making the behavior worse.
Your job is to create the conditions. Their job is to do the thing, on their timeline. Keep the deadline stress out of the potty conversations entirely.
Instead of "you HAVE to go in the potty" — try "it feels a little weird right? I get it. Lots of kids feel like that. Your body knows what to do." Validating the discomfort without making the pull-up the solution keeps the conversation open.
Avoid: shame, comparisons to other kids, big dramatic reactions to accidents. All of those create anxiety, and anxiety makes stool withholding worse. Your calm and consistency are the actual training tool here.
If your child is withholding to the point of painful impaction, if it's been more than 3–4 days without a bowel movement, or if there's blood — stop the home strategies and call the doctor. What presents as behavioral refusal is sometimes constipation or encopresis (overflow leakage around impacted stool) that needs medical intervention first. No amount of sticker charts will fix that, and trying will just make everyone miserable.
Many camps don't verify potty training at the time of registration — they verify at drop-off. So register anyway if you're close. You have until the first day of camp, not the first day of registration, to be ready.
If you're genuinely worried you won't make it: look for programs without a potty training requirement as a backup. Some programs serving younger toddlers, special needs populations, or flexible summer programs don't require it. Call and ask directly — don't assume from the website.
Browse summer programs near you to find options filtered by age group and location across Hamilton County.
If you start now and your child is developmentally ready, here's a realistic window:
Not every child will follow this timeline. Some will take longer. Some will surprise you and be done by week two. But if you start now, with consistency and low pressure, six weeks gives you a real shot.
Most Hamilton County summer camps — in Carmel, Fishers, Zionsville, Westfield, and Noblesville — do require full potty training for their standard programs. Parks and rec summer programs, private day camps, YMCA camps, and specialty programs (sports, arts, STEM) all typically have this requirement for kids ages 3 and up.
Registration season peaks late March through April. Spots in popular programs fill fast. If you're waiting until potty training is complete before you register, you may miss the spots you want.
Our advice: register now for what you want, then make the potty training your focus for the next six weeks. And have a backup option identified — browse local summer programs to see what's available, filter by age and town, and keep a second option in your back pocket.
A lot of parents in your exact situation — with a registration deadline circled and a child who is very much not cooperating — have been through this and gotten there in time. The combination of switching to underwear, consistent scheduled sit times, the right reward for your specific kid, and calm (even when it's hard to be calm) is what works.
Start today. Not next week. Today. Six weeks is enough time — but only if you start the clock now.
And if you need to find camps in your area — whether you're in Zionsville, Carmel, Westfield, or Fishers — Living Lini's camp listings have local programs sorted by age, town, and session dates so you can see what's still open near you.
You've got this. So does your kid. They just don't know it yet.
Browse summer programs across Zionsville, Carmel, Westfield, Fishers, and Noblesville — filtered by age, town, and session dates. Know what's open before spots fill.
Browse Local Camps →Most day camps in Carmel, Fishers, Zionsville, Westfield, and Noblesville require children to be fully potty trained — including bowel movements. This is standard for programs serving ages 3–5. Policies vary by camp, so confirm before registering. Browse local camps by age group to see what's available near you.
Urine training often clicks within a few days to a few weeks once a child is ready. Bowel training typically takes longer — sometimes 4 to 8 weeks of consistent reinforcement. If camp registration is 6 weeks away and your child is developmentally ready (shows awareness, can communicate needs, follows simple instructions), that's a realistic window to make meaningful progress.
Stool withholding and potty refusal are very common in kids ages 2.5 to 4. What helps: removing time pressure, using a step stool so feet are supported, scheduled sit times after meals (no pressure to produce), and the right reward for your child specifically. If withholding has lasted more than two weeks or your child seems to be in pain, talk to your pediatrician — constipation often underlies behavioral refusal.
Some programs — typically those serving younger toddlers or flexible early childhood programs — don't require full potty training. These are less common in standard day camp settings. Your best option is to call camps directly and ask. Browse Hamilton County programs and filter by age to find options for your child.
Register anyway if you're close. Most camps verify at drop-off, not at registration. That gives you until the first day of camp. If you're genuinely unsure you'll make it, identify a backup program that has different requirements — and keep working on training in parallel. Six weeks is a real window if you start now.
One weekly text with what's due this week — no apps, no newsletters, just the info you need before a spot disappears.